If there’s a Christmas tradition that has done some good PR for itself it’s well and truly Christmas crackers…

The little goodies that fly across the room every time you pop one (if you’re lucky enough for it not to go straight for your neighbour’s face!) are completely random and worthless, the hats are hideous (and don’t fit my big head!) and the jokes are often a bit of a let down.

Despite all this, you can be pretty sure you’ll be crackin’ one of these little poppies at Chrissy this year!

So in the spirit of it all (and because who will read a serious business blog two days before Christmas?) we’ve decided to get crackin’ in our office and share with you the top 13 cracker jokes of the season!*

Happy laughing!

  1. What happened to the Hyena who swallowed an oxo cube?
  2. What did the sea say to the sand?
  3. What do you call someone who makes clothes for rabbits?
  4. How do you get down from an elephant?
  5. What do you call two robbers?
  6. What do you call a train loaded with toffee?
  7. Why do cows lie down in the rain?
  8. What do hedgehogs have for lunch?
  9. Why did the bull wear a bell?
  10. What do ghosts eat?
  11. What is an underground train full of professors called?
  12. What do you do when you see a big lion?
  13. What do you call a horse in his pyjamas?



  1. He made a laughing stock of himself
  2. Nothing, he just waved
  3. A hare dresser
  4. You don’t, you get it from a duck
  5. A pair of knickers
  6. A chew chew train
  7. To keep each udder dry
  8. Prickled onions
  9. Because her horn did not work
  10. Goulash
  11. A tube of smarties
  12. Hope he doesn’t see you
  13. A zebra


* 13 crackers were harmed for this experiment…

By Kim Larochelle, PR Mentor

You can find Kim on LinkedIn and Twitter